WeGotMud

Off The Trail => Funny Pages => Jokes/Funny Pictures => Topic started by: bogger564 on July 23, 2012, 06:05:53 PM

Title: cowboy named bud
Post by: bogger564 on July 23, 2012, 06:05:53 PM
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Wyoming when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust..

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany ..

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep...
Now give me back my dog.

Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: lilred on July 23, 2012, 07:23:20 PM
==lmaoo
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: bubba on July 24, 2012, 12:05:18 AM
 applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd applaudd
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: 390JOE on July 24, 2012, 05:04:22 AM
loll
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: burl on July 25, 2012, 12:51:13 AM
lolll
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: Jjay78 on July 25, 2012, 01:32:56 PM
Quote from: lilred on July 23, 2012, 07:23:20 PM
==lmaoo
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: larry60 on November 07, 2012, 07:08:57 PM
 applaudd
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: black07ss on November 07, 2012, 11:30:51 PM
Quote from: lilred on July 23, 2012, 07:23:20 PM
==lmaoo
Title: Re: cowboy named bud
Post by: HellYeah4x4 on November 13, 2012, 09:01:57 PM
i dont care who ya are thats   ==censor funny rite there